Sunday, July 21, 2013

Lies

"He was a murderer from the beginning, and has nothing to do with the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies."
John 8:44
Oops...it's been 4 months since my last blog post. Life has been busy! I will do a life update in an upcoming entry (hopefully later this week) but there has been something on my heart that I want to share today.
Several of my friends have confided in me over the past few months and what they are going through is really rough. I'm talking 'life will never be the same' rough. I have been thinking and praying for them often, but I can't help but think, "What if they never told me?" What if they never shared what was going on behind the scenes? What if they would have just kept on living like nothing was tearing them up inside?
I fall into this trap all too often, I think I can handle everything on my own and keep pushing through internalizing my fears, worries, anxieties, and struggles until it's too much and I completely breakdown. This was most evident during a few seasons of life when depression took over, but I still struggle with it on a smaller scale day to day.
Ultimately, it boils down to this - Satan's Lies.  I think that we are all told and internalize some sort of lie that keeps us from being open and vulnerable with others around us.  My lies tend to be that no one can understand what I am going through, everyone else has their own issues to deal with and so they don't need mine, or I will be judged for not being able to handle things on my own.  I'm sure you can think of other lies that you have been told, perhaps that other people won't care about your problems because you're not worth the battle or that whomever you trust with your fears and failures will betray that trust.  I know there are many lies we are told, but what I have learned about these lies is that as soon as they are identified they melt away.  I don't mean to say that issues we have dealt with for years magically disappear - trust takes a long time to build (or rebuild), building self-worth and confidence can only be done one brick at a time, and pride continues to draw us back into ourselves and tempt us to keep everything tucked away for no one else to see.  But, when we choose to ignore the lies that Satan tells us and break barriers by becoming vulnerable and telling others about what is going on inside our heads and hearts the freedom of Christ can be revealed.
"In him and through faith in him we may approach God with freedom and confidence"
Ephesians 3:12
What typically happens with me is that a small issue crops up - I become stressed with an issue at work, I can't get a good night's rest, I am worrying about things out of my control - I start by trying to handle it on my own.  I do pray, I ask the Lord for help, read my Bible, but still the problem persists.  After several days (or weeks) of frustration and anxiety, I break down (usually to Bryan) a teary mess and ask him to pray for me...suddenly I can sleep, the anxiety is lifted, and Satan's lies are broken.
I continually try (key word try) to identify Satan's lies. Instead of dealing with it on my own, I concentrate on verbalizing these lies to trusted friends and family around me who can help me by praying for me and asking me about how I am dealing with whatever lie might be thrown at me that week.  I would encourage you to find people in  your life to verbalize the hard stuff to and work to become vulnerable on a daily basis.  I think that vulnerability is the hardest and best thing we can do for each other.
I am thankful that my friends decided to tell me about the tough stuff going on in their lives so that I can continue to pray for them and ask them how they are doing.  I know that it was difficult for them to tell me what was really going on, but I can see the relief on their faces once they have told other people. This is an inspiration to me to keep talking and being vulnerable. I hope that you will do so, too!
Cheers,
Amy